Bathroom in a Jar

(Two guys are hanging out, watching television.)

(First guy gets up from the couch.)

Second guy: "Hey man, where are you going?"

First guy: "Nowhere, I just have to use the bathroom."

Second guy (casually): "Oh...keep your pee, please."

First guy (surprised): "I'm sorry, what was that?"

Second guy: "Please keep your pee, for me."

First guy (shocked): "..."

Second guy: "Okay, look, it's not really a big deal, but I collect pee."

First guy: "What the fuck are you talking about?"

Second guy (hesitant): "Alright, here's the thing--I collect urine. It started when I was little, and I used to occasionally go to the bathroom in a jar. After a few months, I realized that I had built up a pretty impressive storage of pee. Soon, I started peeing in jars fulltime."

First guy: "Jesus Chri--"

Second guy: "However, my pee wasn't enough. I soon began collecting all the pee I could get my jar around. Although this can be quite costly, you can't really put a price on pee in a jar."

First guy: "So...that's kind of...neat, I guess?"

Second guy: "You bet your bippie it is! To date, I have built up one of the most extensive pee collections, or "pee library", if you will. So are you going to do me a favor, and pee in a jar?"

First guy: "Well, it still seems kind of --"

Second guy: "C'mon man, you know you want to."

First guy: "Guy, it's just weird."

Second guy: "If you are really my friend, then you'll urinate in a jar."

First guy: "Still, even you have to admit00"

Second guy (very angrily): "If you don't pee in this jar, I swear to God, I will rough you up so badly, that..."

First guy: "Okay, okay. Hand me that jar."

(First guy gets jar, walks into bathroom. The camera shows a close-up of the bathroom door being closed.)

(P.S. Throughout the entire sketch, Second Guy keeps drinking bottled water at an incredibly fast rate.)

THE END